Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Follow The Leader

I want to scream “This is not what I signed up for”
He gently reminds me I surrendered my all to Him.
I feel hurt, forsaken, alone.
He brings scripture to my mind about Him never leaving me.
I want to run,
I am not sure if I want to run away from the life I have
Or run to Him begging for understanding.
To whom much is given, much is expected.
He gave His all for me,
But I do not want to give Him my time.

My mouth speaks words of being willing to be uncomfortable for Him.
My heart fills with anger the moment something becomes out of place in my perfect world.
The words He speaks to me seem contradictory.
He reminds me His plan is perfect.

I muster up the strength to tell Him I am willing
He tells me He knew I would be
I am humbled
He leads me to the path I will walk down
With my hand in His, together we take the first steps.

Thursday, February 4, 2010

His Child

If you were to walk in to my home you would hear the word “no” around a hundred times in an hour. I have a one year old who loves to jump. She is not bias, she will jump off of anything! Last night was no exception, after telling my daughter no a million times she decide not to heed my instruction and jumped anyhow. Her landing did not go so well, to be exact her face was the first thing to hit the floor. As she stood up tears streaming down her face she said mama in her sweet little pitiful voice and raised her hands for me to pick her up. I ran to her, swopped her up in my arms hugged her and let her know that she would be ok because “mama was here”. I wiped the tears from her eyes, loved up on her a little bit more and she was ready to play again. Much to my dismay this time she headed to the couch and started to climb. I thought to myself here we go again. This time something different happened. She chose to slide down and skipped the jumping off. I applauded her and said “Sarah’s a big girl”! She liked that. She loved know that she made the right choice.

So many times in life God warns us against things that will leave us hurt and broken. Yet we do not always heed his advice and we take the jump into sin. When we take that leap we end up standing there hurt and upset crying and reaching out to the same God that we just disobeyed. He comes, immediately picks us up tells us it’s ok because He is here, and when we have gained our confidence back and feel as if we are ready to face the world again he sends us off but always stays close by. And when He sees us heading back to our old ways he thinks please no not again. When we turn from the sin that we were headed to he says “oh, how you are growing!” and we can feel good having the peace of knowing that we are growing in Christ.

Deuteronomy 31:6 (New International Version)
Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the LORD your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you."